In honor of this milestone, I thought I would reflect on what I have learned during this amazing year of marriage. Ever since we began announcing our engagement, there were those who had advice for us. People wanted to help us- to tell us what worked for them and well, what didn't. The genres of advice ranged from wedding tips, to where to go on our honeymoon, to how to "survive" married life.
I listened...but I thought I knew what to expect (insert "I-Told-You-So's" and laughs from family and friends). Little did I know, I was about to embark on an exciting and sometimes confusing road with two little words on June 19th, 2010.
Mike is no doubt, the man that I was meant to marry. We were absolutely created for one another. From our loves to our hates, we have always had so much in common. He once was my "dream guy" in college - I never, ever thought he would be interested in ME. Now here we are; one year of marriage behind us and oh the lessons I know that I have learned.
1. Marriage is hard. Now, don't go thinking I am not happily married. Go an ask anyone that is married. To keep it together and functioning, you have to work at it.
2. My husband loves me for who I am all the time. He loves me with no make-up, sweatpants, and a t-shirt. He loves me when I make mistakes. He loves me when I embarrass myself. He loves me all of the time. Due to my insecurities, this was a huge revelation to me. Often, out of nowhere, I will smile when I think of this.
3. I AM STUBBORN...and so is Mike. We have argued about some of the most ridiculous topics this past year from opening and/or closing the blinds to the wording of a question. However, due to our stubborn traits and the resulting "arguments" we now have a plethora of inside jokes and laughs about these instances.
4. I am still learning to compromise. Prior to marrying Mike, I thought I had this one the bag. Hahaha...not at all. However, marriage has made me better at it. :)
5. I am not the calm, cool, and collected person that I often portray myself to me. 95.7 percent of the time, I explode situations and/or problems into something more than they should be. Of course, to anyone but my husband, this goes unnoticed because I keep it all upstairs, in my head. Mike is always my voice of reason and comfort - this is one of the many reasons I am blessed to call him my husband.
6. Laughter is always the best route. If married couples can't laugh at themselves then they are missing out. Some of the most fun and memorable times I have had with Mike this past year involve hilarious, ridiculous situations.
7. I thought I knew just about everything there was to know about Mike. Currently, one of my favorite things out of each day is to learn more and more about the wonderful man I married 366 days ago. For instance, I recently learned that he doesn't like pudding - haha- trivial, yet in the Holtzhower household, we go by the motto "I don't eat to live, I live to eat". Food likes and dislikes are vital ;)
8. This final lesson is probably the most influential of them all. As I prepared to marry Mike, I started to realize how similar the love a husband and the love of God are. God loves us unconditionally - no strings attached. He forgives us - he supports us - he adores every fiber of each of our beings. He laughs with us, cries with us, and smiles upon us in moments of happiness. Mike loves me in these same ways and it is my hope that everyone can feel this kind of love from a spouse. I truly think that it what marriage is all about - love, comfort, respect, and support.
So, those are the lessons I have learned while soaking in a fun and special year with my husband. By no means am I an expert, nor do I think I will ever be. However, it was fun to reflect and think about how blessed I am to be married to such a wonderful man. Honestly, most of the posts I put on this blog are for me ;) - so selfish...
Until next time :)
Ashley
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